My log (1)

June 2, 2019

The BTS Festa will be kicked off in a couple of days and all ARMYs worldwide are busy planning and carrying out fun activities to show their love to our boys. While BigHit and BTS are busy setting up and practicing for their wonderful performances plus concerts, I lay in my bed, wearily reading a book. Neither do I have interest in the storyline nor is it appealing in any way. I am sleep deprived from watching the live streamed Speak Yourself Concert at Wembley Stadium at midnight and suffering from the post concert depression.

My lips are burning because I picked at them while reading the book. Secretly, I too was thinking of ways to make my message of ‘I Love BTS’ reach my boys. Do they check out fan accounts? But they don’t have the time to do so. Whatever! ARMYs are always fun to chat with, hang out with and to do things with. So planning BTS projects and chipping in is joy.

Sometimes I just wonder what I would’ve been doing if I didn’t know about BTS or didn’t follow them. I don’t want to imagine that scenario as I feel I’m in a very comfy warm place now.

I look back to when I first came to know BTS. Seeing BTS for the first time was pure serendipity in my life.

Then came my struggle to remember their names and voices. Listening to their music, watching Bangtan bombs for hours and hours – even without subtitles just to see 7 grown up Korean men playing games, eating, derping, laughing, jumping, cuddling, crying and everything!!

Stanning BTS was perhaps the best decision of my life. I have observed some changes in my personality (or persona;)). I guess I’ve opened up to the world. I’m certainly more confident than ever. I remain true to myself and I love myself all the more. Mayhaps I’ve grown up and matured but still the credit goes to Bangtan Sonyeondan.

I have my career to worry about but frankly it’s stressful to think about my future. As I stated earlier, I am exceptionally comfortable with what I am doing now (nothing actually). So here I go, with no planning for my future but to live the present to its fullest. And because BTS is always there.